Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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