May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
this will be a night to untag.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
