my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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