just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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