hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
