Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Randomize
