White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize