My first STD was from a foam party
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
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