I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
