I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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