Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
