why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Who died my cat blue again?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
