I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
