They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
