is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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