when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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