i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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