My room smells like vodka and shame
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
