Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
