I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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