I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
