K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
