The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
how do you play pong handcuffed?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
