Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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