chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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