Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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