Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
