we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
