is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
