she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
