i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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