i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
