marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
