whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
