It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize