omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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