As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
