I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
