Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
