You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
