porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
