David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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