GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
