dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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