can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
We need a shit load of segways right now
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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