I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
