Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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