He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
