So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
