Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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