so explain again why im purple
no
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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