you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
